Unpublished short fiction

This is a true story. I hooked up with the hottest woman in Hollywood and it was the worst sex I ever had. I can’t tell you who it was because she’d sue me for sure, but picture the most gorgeous movie star celebrity you can think of, and she has a perfect body, then imagine her giving you a dry painful blowjob with no excitement in the act whatsoever. Then picture her trying to jerk you off and it feels like she’s gonna rip the skin off your dick.
      Those things didn’t exactly happen in that order. They didn’t even happen on the same day. I’m just glad I can finally tell someone, ‘cause this is the craziest shit that ever happened to me.
      I want to give her a name for the story, and I want it to be a true name, but I don’t want to be mean or anything, so I’m just going to call her Drymouth. I met her on the set of this movie you might have seen, and of course I can’t tell you which one, but it wasn’t her biggest, most famous movie. It was a movie she made to try to show off what a good actress she is.
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5,132 words